Tag Archives: Widows

Reno On My New Condo ~ life surging forward!

I moved to Jacksonville from Brooklyn (NYC) over two years ago and have been looking (on and off) for a new home…and soon realized I was in need of a condo. I am through with yard work and hiring handymen to do outdoor upkeep on the house. Through, I say! Through! I finally found the perfect spot for me in the Old Mandarin neighborhood.

Hebrews 3:4 [New American Standard Bible] ~ For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God.

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I decided on this condo in large part because of the beautiful tiled floors and fireplace. Of course the existing ceiling fan had to be swapped out for a new one, same thing with the small chandelier in the dining room area of the open living space.

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Ray, a friend of Christian author Dalyn Woods, is doing my reno. Here he’s working on the electric outlet in my daughter Victoria’s room.

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Another shot of Victoria’s room.

 

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The master bedroom after the first coat of paint. The bar stools for the counter off the kitchen were given a dark stain. We got them through Offer Up at $5 each.

When I take a breath after painting a door, or trim (Victoria has slathered white over the walls), I realized I’m a further step away from Brooklyn and my late-husband,, both physically and metaphorically. After two years, the bad days come much, much less frequently. Life does go on. The move is fun and exciting, but I can’t wait for the work to be done so we can settle in.

 


Memorial Day And You’re Alone ~ singles, soloers

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Some of us are single, solo, and alone because our hero husband died on the battlefield, or in a training accident. Some are single, solo, and alone because our hero husband came back from the battlefield all messed up in the mind or the body, and he left us.

In this world today, Memorial Day is not only to honor departed military, but also departed first responders. They are also on the battlefield to hold off those who would destroy civilization.

In times of grief, darkness, loneliness, it’s the time for prayer…for all of us.  This is the time to know God loves us. He has not left us. He is near us. It’s time to know what God’s Word says about us.

Psalm 139 ~ New American Standard Version [NASB]

O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
You understand my thought from afar.
You scrutinize my path and my lying down,
And are intimately acquainted with all my ways.
4 Even before there is a word on my tongue,
Behold, O Lord, You know it all.
You have enclosed me behind and before,
And laid Your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
It is too high, I cannot attain to it.

Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
If I ascend to heaven, You are there;
If I make my bed in Sheol, behold, You are there.
If I take the wings of the dawn,
If I dwell in the remotest part of the sea,
10 Even there Your hand will lead me,
And Your right hand will lay hold of me.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will overwhelm me,
And the light around me will be night,”
12 Even the darkness is not dark to You,
And the night is as bright as the day.
Darkness and light are alike to You.

13 For You formed my inward parts;
You wove me in my mother’s womb.
14 I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Wonderful are Your works,
And my soul knows it very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth;
16 Your eyes have seen my unformed substance;
And in Your book were all written
The days that were ordained for me,
When as yet there was not one of them.

17 How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand.
When I awake, I am still with You.

19 O that You would slay the wicked, O God;
Depart from me, therefore, men of bloodshed.
20 For they speak against You wickedly,
And Your enemies take Your name in vain.
21 Do I not hate those who hate You, O Lord?
And do I not loathe those who rise up against You?
22 I hate them with the utmost hatred;
They have become my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me and know my anxious thoughts;
24 And see if there be any hurtful way in me,
And lead me in the everlasting way.

 

Tips and Suggestions for Singles/Soloers on Memorial Day:

  • Make sure you have time with God.
  • Start your day with praise and worship music in your home.
  • Plan a Memorial Day activity with family and friends. Make sure there’s time for remembrance and time for fun in your day.
  • Get around others. Don’t be alone all day. Go to a public Memorial Day activity.
  • If you need to get away from grief, go to lunch/dinner and a comedic movie with a family member(s) or a friend(s). Go bowling, swimming, surfing, fishing with family and/or friends.

May you and yours be blessed this Memorial Day.

Memorial Day


Joseph D. Chillemi ~ honoring my husband on the first year of his passing

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Joseph on New Year’s Eve several years ago.

I’m aware of several widows’ groups in my area, one of them for Christian widows. For some reason, I’ve avoided them. As it turns out, I’ve attracted to myself a small group of Christian women friends: some widowed, some divorced, and one is even married. So, I’m far from alone.

As the anniversary of Joseph’s death approached, I became super aware of conversations about the first year “date” of the passing of a husband. It seems, at this point in time, there’s a great deal of counsels to avoid the word “anniversary.” They’re calling it “marking” the death of a spouse. Popular culture is saying widows should not celebrate the death of their husbands, though, I’m sure there are some who for their own very personal reasons do just that. So, it certainly isn’t one-size fits all. For me, I look to the Bible on how to handle this monumental date.

 

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Christmas season at Houston’s Steak House (now closed) in the Roosevelt Field Mall, Long Island. I have no idea what I was reading. I’m a notorious planner, so it could’ve been a notice about a Christmas event. He probably said something like, “Get your nose out of that paper, woman, and give me a kiss.”

 

 

So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. ~ Ephesians 5:33 [New Living Translation]

 

 

 

As a Christian wife, I honor the life of my husband, the years he had on earth, the people he touched and the positive impact he had as a husband, father, son, friend, co-worker, social worker. Christian wives celebrate the passing of a spouse who has gone on to be with the Lord, I know in my heart, Joseph is joyful beyond what I could ever imagine.

 

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On my birthday at Clemente’s Maryland Crab House in Brooklyn. I’m sure I was 39 — again.

 

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Joseph on his birthday with Beauty. She’s 11 now and still lives with me

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Joseph and Victoria in St. Augustine, FL. The sun worshippers. LOL

 

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Joseph and Alyssa (L) and Delayne (R) in Boca Raton, FL

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. ~ 2 Corinthians 3:17 {New American Standard Bible]

 

 

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Boca Raton

 

 


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